I'm pretty fed up with my father. Long story short, he's not a very good father. He didnt even believe in my passion at all. Sometimes, I wanna get away from him. I know I can move out, but i cant stop wishing if I had a different father, an uncle, or whatever - someone who can treat me like a son, and support what I want to do.
I was physically and emotionally disappointed by my father. As far as I remember, he never care for me , accept me , initiate conversation and give me attention . I hate being lonely. He was never there whenever I need a shoulder to cry on. The day when I was young, he always left me cry in loneliness.
The most important, he never know what I really needed. He always treat me like a stranger, never gave me support for what I did. He's become the reason why I hate another part of myself, the reason why I wanna go out there, the reason why I dont wanna stay here anylonger. I hate when he tried to domimate something that he doesn't understand or shortly -- know me.
I just want to be happy like another. Want to feel like I'm an importance person no matter what happens. Want him to love me even if I walked in the wrong path. I just want to feel the warmth of an embrace.
Back then again when I was teen, he wants me to succeed. But he never had the time to understand my feelings. He never cared what I planned for. Instead, he never really cared for my happiness. I'm still like a stranger in his eyes.